And appropriately themed 'I want to be elected', welcome to my shave
Harry SE Truman - Colonial General V2
Franklin not a DE Roosevelt - Stainless Mongoose
Franklin Pierce - Feather Super Professional
George W Brush - Groom Room brush
Adpraham Lincoln - ADP soap
Herbert Smoover - L'Oréal moisturiser
I started this week hoping to elect one razor to the position of President of the United Shaves of the Cabinet. The Zen of razors and the slayer of beards. So off I went to work armed with perhaps my two favourite SE's in the Colonial V2 and the stainless Mongoose. Unfortunately I spent two nights at home and forcibly persuaded myself (didn't take too much persuasion to be honest) to use the original brass and stainless Generals. Bad move. A bad bad move. Like, a really really bad bad move.
I now faced a new dilemma as the original Colonials are Stonkingly good, but to get back on track this shave was all about the V2 vs The Mongoose. To put them on a level playing field both sported the same Feather Super Pro blades and prep being the same for both. Shave one half with one and, state the obvious, the other half with the other.
And, shave away, but before that, a quick word for all those with a legality to vote. ADP and the Groom Room whiskey barrel brush. Fucking brilliant.
Thank you
My face is kind of split between ugly and effing ugly but fortunately both sides tend to shave much the same. I know some have favourable sides and in my case both are favourable. Mrs Satanfriendly would probably argue that neither are.
The Mongoose. A rather big and ugly kind of SE razor which speaks its mind and just goes and gets the job done with a 'lacking in finesse' methodology. Originally bought from the BST and carries a kind of love/hate relationship as many scold it while many heap praise. For me it is one totally competent piece of kit which delivers time after time irrespective of which blade it is paired with and always feels secure. It totally lacks that edginess which makes one think 'this is about to cut me open'. On this occasion it was no different. Give it the sharpest blade in the pack and get the closest of shaves. No shit, no hassle, job done.
The General V2. The polar opposite. Slim, tactile and doesn't feel like some large cumbersome candidate in team shave 2020. Bought from new and by far the most expensive bit of facial hair removing implement I have ever owned. Was it worth the outlay? Too damn right. In every way it presents itself physically, that is exactly how it shaves. Throw it around and voila ici. Bum fluff one minute and shaved to perfection the next. Does exactly what it says on the cardboard box and the bits of paper it comes with. No poop, no fuss, job done
And the votes are in.
And the monkey says 'Fuck this shaving malarkey. I declare it a draw'.
But wait there are cries of malpractice against the V2 with an apparent vote by a long deceased jar of Vulfix Persian Musk which met its demise some five years ago and apparent multiple votes by a number of Japanese blades who are claiming that a pack of 20 equates to 20 individual votes. These have all been rejected by the Colonial party as being untrue and without evidence. The Stainless Mongoosers (who gained success in the non-rust belt) have stated that they will be lodging legal challenges with the supreme shaving court. Watch this space.
'Excuse me. But what about us?' are the cries from the First Colonial General V1 party.
After a general consensus across the board it has been decided that there will be no president elect and in fact the shaving cabinet will be run as an Anarcho-Syndicalist commune with equality across the board and a leader based on a rota system.
Was it a good shave? Bloody right it was. As smooth as buggery and as content as winning an election (or not?). BBS all the way. Babe's Bottom Smooth
No one seems to know where these were made, maybe China or even Japan?.
You want made in Japan? Then have some Aldious.
'Ahem' says the new boy in town the Ikon.