Only last week I wrote '19 pages of shaves this week. A great turn out folk'. And then I sodded off until today. A whole bloody four days with no effort from myself to try for 20 this week. Well bugger that, Satan is back.
I actually started this write up last night but decorating and family in general have been very time consuming and so thought best I leave until this morning. Then decorating and family in general got in the way once again. And finally, I find time. The police are busy in the living room inspecting the not so living family. I did say they got in the way, but I do have a nicely painted shower room. The detective inspector in charge did make a pleasant passing comment that way when duty called elsewhere other than inspecting things. I did apologise for the lack of toilet paper.
So as Meatloaf sang 'Two out of three ain't bad'. As Mrs Satanfriendly says, 'Well the past few hundred have been shite so where do you get the two out of three from?' Well in this case you can have two shaves for the price of one made over the first three days of this new(?) week of SOTD's.
Onesie - Muhle R89
OneBlade (two edges) - Polsilver Lodz
One stop brush - Wee Whiskey Barrel
Only one Brian - Signature Soaps Wicstun
One finisher - L'Occitane Cade balm
Two up - Occams Enoch
Two times the blade (one edge) - Kai Titan
Two bit player - PAA Pelegrino
Two in to one - Abbate Y Mantia Krokos
Two plus two - Collegen moisturiser
It's karaoke shave! Guess you know the score..
Baby I can shave all night
But that ain't getting me nowhere
I’ve shaved everything I possibly can
And there’s fuck all else for me to clear
And maybe you can shave all night
But I’ll still be the 70’s porn star I feel
The lather is really piling up on my face
I wish you’d leave my fucking razor here
I brushed it on and I shaved it off
I tried to shave away with so much care
I'm tired of blood and so much it could fill a trough
But I’ve been cold shaving far too long
I'm shavin' icicles instead of hairs
And all I can do is keep on shavin’ me
I can shave me, but can’t shave you
But there ain't no way I'm ever gonna Brazil you
Now don't be sad, oh, 'cause I tried to shave my nads
Now don't be sad no 'cause one out of two is all I have
You'll never find my razor by a kitchen sink
It’s no good looking for my missing hairy pink
I know you're lookin' for my prairie oyster in your collection of rocks
But the fucking dog ate it when he found it
At the bottom of his biscuit box
I can't lie, I can't trim your bits with the razor I’ve got
No matter how I try, I'll never be able
I’d end up removing more than just the hair on your bot
Well, there's only one girl I would ever shave
That was so many year ago
And though I'll never get her pubes from outta my teeth
She never shaved my back, ooh oh no
I remember how she shaved me on a stormy night
She lathered me and got me out of the bath
And though I pleaded and I begged her not to trim my baws
She stuffed the brush where there is no light of day
And she kept on shavin' me, kept on shavin' me, kept on shavin' me
But there ain't no way I'm ever gonna Brazil you
Now don't be sad, oh, 'cause I tried to shave my nads
Now don't be sad no 'cause one out of two is all I have
I can shave me, but can’t shave you
But there ain't no way I'm ever gonna Brazil you
Now don't be sad, oh, 'cause I tried to shave my nads
Now don't be sad no 'cause one out of two is all I have
Baby we can shave all night
But that ain't getting hair nowhere
'Smile if You've had more than two'
Two really great shaves both with great results and grin inducing finishes. What more could one ever want? Two Japanese girly videos? Your wishes are my command....
Arghhhhhh. Two doses of Midori !? Satanfriendly go home.
I'll tell you what is the worse bit of being SOTD absent. Having to read 9 pages of SOTD's then 'like' 'like' 'love' 'like' etc etc. Can't we just have a single button called 'I love you all'? Because I do
