Where am I going wrong?

[Greybeard]

While the cif is definitely a good exfoliating cream, I find it dries the skin a little, try using fully synthetic two stroke oil, it should help condition, ready for the lather.

What? Do you think I'm a lawnmower or just plain stupid? I'm trying to be serious here!

 

[Fergiebilly]

Don't let Mrchick see this, he takes no encouraging

Yeah..I Know..Crazy Dude..

Billy

 

[Glen_Lee]

 

[Greybeard]

Your problem is you are not using a NOS twin blade. Must cost a small fortune in import fees. Hey, but will make you feel like a shaving God and your shave will be transformed. Other than that; looking good with the setup. Maybe a small shave den tour?

WTF is a shave den? I got a shed.

 

[dogsmro]

Yeah..I Know..Crazy Dude..

Billy

Yes he would consider that kukri a mild blade

 

[nick_s]

WTF is a shave den? I got a shed.

Behind this here door:

Is a shave den

 

[Greybeard]

Don't let Mrchick see this, he takes no encouraging

I tried that a while ago but I think you will agree that I have refined my shaving ritual somewhat since then...clearly the Kukri is more in tune with traditional straight razor than the chainsaw...I mean, really, come on people!

 

[Fergiebilly]

Yes he would consider that kukri a mild blade

Mr Chicks Mentor..

Billy

 

[Greybeard]

Behind this here door:

Is a shave den

So you saying I'm a short hairy bloody hobbit now? Wow...starting to think this forum doesn't treat new people with any kind of respect.

 

[Greybeard]

Mr Chicks Mentor..

Billy

What shave cream is that? Did he use a pre-shave? Mmmm...interesting...worth looking into.

 

[Glen_Lee]

So you saying I'm a short hairy bloody hobbit now? Wow...starting to think this forum doesn't treat new people with any kind of respect.

Toe shaver?

 

[Greybeard]

Swap Asda for Fairy, the blade for a Claymore, the yard brush for one of those car wash brushes and you'll be grand.

Oh yeah...like I haven't already tried all those and more...surely you can come up with at least one original idea? I'm bleeding here, man...I need help, not throw-away tired suggestions.

 

[Greybeard]

Toe shaver?

What? I mean...What?

 

[Fergiebilly]

So you saying I'm a short hairy bloody hobbit now? Wow...starting to think this forum doesn't treat new people with any kind of respect.

 

[nick_s]

Of course, you could try ze combine harvester? Or a logging team. These are employed by some during deforestation sessions, but of course Greenpeace could get involved.

 

[London_Peculiar]

I really don't know what's happened to the esprit de corps on this forum. I think dogsmro is the closest to diagnose the real problem, which is a lack of a decent pre-shave oil.

This will sort your shave out, but do try and get a can from before the 2014 re-formulation (glad we've finally got over that drama guys).