You just couldn't make it up...

SoapAlchemist · Wednesday December 9, 2009

Now I'm even more scared :shock:

:shock: I fear the advice you may be given!! The main people I have to worry about giving advice on these things to (well, I'm hoping slurry and horsses won't come into it

is my two oldest grandchildren, who are racing towards hormonal overload as I type, little realising what lays in store..........now that I think of it, neither of the strange practises that have been highlighted above get girls pregant.........can you catch Aids from.....oh, dear, this site has corrupted me!

hando · Thursday December 10, 2009

Pig Cat said:
OK. Shagging slurry and interfering with horses is definitely not on. I'm absolutely clear about both these things. Now is there anything else I should know to keep me out of trouble?

after hearing what deep sea fishermen do to skate i refuse to eat any flat-fish

Pig Cat · Thursday December 10, 2009

hando said:
Pig Cat said:

OK. Shagging slurry and interfering with horses is definitely not on. I'm absolutely clear about both these things. Now is there anything else I should know to keep me out of trouble?

Click to expand...

after hearing what deep sea fishermen do to skate i refuse to eat any flat-fish

Come on then, do spill the beans (or should that be seed?)!!!

hunnymonster · Thursday December 10, 2009

Take a look on youtube, I believe "Skate" "Fishermen" "West Cumbria" are the terms you need to seek

antdad · Thursday December 10, 2009

Skate? A bit cold but that can be useful. My former brother in law was from Redruth, what a bunch of shit f**king inbreds.

"The family were terrified" Of what exactly? A dirty todger? They are farmers for ***** sake. Get your gun on your pitch fork or just give the fella his own personal pile of shit that he can be alone with.

Jeltz · Friday January 8, 2010

Pig Cat said:
OK. Shagging slurry and interfering with horses is definitely not on. I'm absolutely clear about both these things. Now is there anything else I should know to keep me out of trouble?

This isn't advisable either

Pig Cat · Friday January 8, 2010

Yoouuch!!!!

Southampton? Hampshire? Now who do we know that lives in Hampshire?

Smell The Glove · Friday January 8, 2010

Pig Cat said:
So wanking in a pile of horse shit is wrong? OK, another one to add to my list... :?

Don't knock it until you've tried it. :roll:

Damian Murphy · Friday January 8, 2010

This isn't advisable either

[/quote]

not advisable , but sometimes you just can't help yourself .

Smell The Glove · Friday January 8, 2010

"The anxious man, aged about 40, gave hospital staff no explanation about how the pipe got stuck after he turned up on Tuesday morning"

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

A big boy did it and ran away!

Jeltz · Friday January 8, 2010

Talk to anyone that's worked in A & E and its apparent that there are plenty of naturists with bad balance that end up falling on or into everyday objects.

slimjim5751 · Friday January 8, 2010

That reminds me must hide the hoover

Damian Murphy · Friday January 8, 2010

slimjim5751 said:
That reminds me must hide tadger in the hoover

Trawlerman · Monday April 5, 2010

Pig Cat said:
So wanking in a pile of horse shit is wrong? OK, another one to add to my list... :?

:lol: I think i'm gonna fit in here just fine with my warped northern sense of humour.

bazwalk · Monday April 5, 2010

I've a friend who works in A&E (see avatar). She says they get a 'slipped while hoovering naked' case at least once a week ! Is this what I'm (not) paying my taxes for ? :shock:

cheese_dave · Monday April 5, 2010

Everyone's heard those "I got me goalie stuck in a vacuum cleaner nozzle" A&E stories by now, surely. Like smoking cigarettes, what makes people who haven't done it before still want to try it?

"Maybe it won't happen to me..."

sscchhppum

:shock:

Bit like Quagmire off Family Guy I guess.